Hate, can you feel it?

I wonder if my mother can feel how much I hate her?

Had a horrible day with my "family" aka group of people I wish would vanish. Now that I have a job hopefully someday I can get the hell out of this basement. I found a goal, there is a condo for rent right near my work so if my crappy car broke down I could walk there and then I could save up money and pay for a real lawyer to help T stay in the country instead of the free lawyer who was nice but probably can't do much for free. If I can get away from my parents I think I would be able to feel so much better about myself. I like my job which is great and eventually I can start paying everybody back that makes me feel good to know there is a light someday. If I can get him legal we will be all right financially. even if he has to leave the country I will stay here and work and take care of M.

My parents other house that I love they said I could rent if I had a job, this is after they said I could live there if I came up with the money for oil. well, friends offered to loan me the oil money they said no, I got a job, now they said no. I give up. When I leave here. I am never ever coming back unless I am dead and my dead body is brought back for some reason out of my control.

Have E and the guys coming by tomorrow that is neat. It's lovely to have friends again. I can see the good life coming just over there...no no over there...see it?

I met a nice guy the other day too. I should write to him.

Look how nice and quiet this little place looks


I will keep that there to remind me to look in the future. first step out of the dungeon, then legal, then loan repayments, then the world is mine muwhaahahahahahahaaaaa