The Final Straw

We found out today some shocking news. I am so angry right now I can't even wrap my head around it. We originally came here because my parents had promised we could live in one of their houses but when we got here they gave it to my brother instead. They installed us in the tiny basement with no light instead. The basement which regularly floods forcing us to stay in motels we can't afford, the basement that had an alarm for Carbon Monoxide going off in it regularly till my mom said it was just malfunctioning and took the battery out. A family of 3 cramped into two rooms.

Anyway, they have other houses which they rent out and one of them is a house I always loved. Its bright and clean and central to everything. Stores are in walking distance, the bus and train to the big city are right there convenient. There is a bustling downtown available. The house has a nice fenced in yard, a big garage. It has light sunny kitchen with 2 bedrooms. Perfect for kids. I have wanted to live in that house since my parents bought it for a song at the right time. It has this wonderful welcoming feeling that I love.

Turns out the house is empty right now. The person who was renting it has moved out. So it's just sitting there EMPTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We live in two tiny rooms with no sunlight no way to get anywhere no hope and they have a perfectly good home. I asked my father today why we couldn't live in it and he said "oh sure if you can pay the heat bill" sarcastically. This is the same guy who bought a brand new car a few weeks ago then used their old one as a trade in for cheap instead of offering it to us. I know parents don't have to help you, it's not a right that we have help. I don't expect them to help me, I know better than that by now. Please can't they think of their grandchild? I am so done with them if I can get out of here. that's it, why do I need to care? I keep trying to convince myself that they are helping us because we do have heat and a roof over our heads but how does that help when we cant afford food and we cant get to the store even if we had money and if I cant get to work. Maybe it's me, maybe I am looking at this from the wrong angle.

We had to go to the hospital today to visit my grandmother who is in ICU. My mother spends 10 hours a day with her. She told me I had to go visit her today and wouldn't let me bring M. I touched the monitor asking what some number meant and managed to turn the whole screen off. Leave it to me. Anyway, this blog is very cathartic, it's nice to have a place to spew out all my turmoil. I wonder if I can sell my soul on Ebay for a car?