2 AM and having homesick pangs

I am looking at photos of our home in New Zealand and wondering why we had to lose everything. I was happier there than I have ever been in my entire life, for one brief golden moment life was how it should be. Because some group of morons had to make the decision to rob someone they destroyed a family's entire life. I miss my beautiful home, my friends, my mountains, my car, my aggravation over the food choices, my ability to get needed asthma medicine easily, my neighboring horses, my fresh fruit stand up the street, my cold mornings with a gas fire, my rainbows, my long walks with M.....I don't usually wish ill on people but I hope someday those guys learn what it is to suffer, the same way they made my family suffer. I still have this frightened feeling that the other shoe is still waiting to drop and we still haven't had everything bad happen.

awww gee, maybe I will go back to watching "Ghost Adventures" on youtube. At least that makes me laugh and might pull me out of this morbid funk I am in all of a sudden. My homesickness started tonight because some New Zealand person made me his contact on flickr. M asks me where our home is and I have to say..we don't have a home. ok..stop stop stop...bye blog, going to watch GA.